1. ABRAM’S DIVINE CALL (Genesis 12:1-9 [1] Now the LORD had said unto Abram, Get thee out of thy country, and from thy kindred, and from thy father's house, unto a land that I will shew thee: [2] And I will make of thee a great nation, and I will bless thee, and make thy name great; and thou shalt be a blessing: [3] And I will bless them that bless thee, and curse him that curseth thee: and in thee shall all families of the earth be blessed. [4] So Abram departed, as the LORD had spoken unto him; and Lot went with him: and Abram was seventy and five years old when he departed out of Haran. [5] And Abram took Sarai his wife, and Lot his brother's son, and all their substance that they had gathered, and the souls that they had gotten in Haran; and they went forth to go into the land of Canaan; and into the land of Canaan they came. [6] And Abram passed through the land unto the place of Sichem, unto the plain of Moreh. And the Canaanite was then in the land. [7] And the LORD appeared unto Abram, and said, Unto thy seed will I give this land: and there builded he an altar unto the LORD, who appeared unto him. [8] And he removed from thence unto a mountain on the east of Bethel, and pitched his tent, having Bethel on the west, and Hai on the east: and there he builded an altar unto the LORD, and called upon the name of the LORD. [9] And Abram journeyed, going on still toward the south.
   See All...)
1. The Fourfold Call (Genesis 12:1Now the LORD had said unto Abram, Get thee out of thy country, and from thy kindred, and from thy father's house, unto a land that I will shew thee:
   See All...)
1. Out of thy country
2. From thy kindred
3. From thy father’s house
4. Unto a land that I will shew thee
5. NOTE:  It was not until Abram completed the first three commands (by separating from Lot) that God actually showed him the land that He had promised him (see Genesis 13:14-15 [14] And the LORD said unto Abram, after that Lot was separated from him, Lift up now thine eyes, and look from the place where thou art northward, and southward, and eastward, and westward: [15] For all the land which thou seest, to thee will I give it, and to thy seed for ever.
   See All...).  When we refuse to complete what God has clearly shown us, we miss out on blessings He has for us.
2. The Sevenfold Promise (Genesis 12:2-3 [2] And I will make of thee a great nation, and I will bless thee, and make thy name great; and thou shalt be a blessing: [3] And I will bless them that bless thee, and curse him that curseth thee: and in thee shall all families of the earth be blessed.
   See All...)
1. I will make of thee a great nation
2. I will bless thee
3. I will make thy name great
4. Thou shalt be a blessing
5. I will bless them that bless thee
6. I will curse him that curseth thee
7. In thee shall all families of the earth be blessed
8. NOTE:  This promise has never been done away with or disannulled (see Galatians 3:15-18 [15] Brethren, I speak after the manner of men; Though it be but a man's covenant, yet if it be confirmed, no man disannulleth, or addeth thereto. [16] Now to Abraham and his seed were the promises made. He saith not, And to seeds, as of many; but as of one, And to thy seed, which is Christ. [17] And this I say, that the covenant, that was confirmed before of God in Christ, the law, which was four hundred and thirty years after, cannot disannul, that it should make the promise of none effect. [18] For if the inheritance be of the law, it is no more of promise: but God gave it to Abraham by promise.
   See All...).
2. ABRAM’S SOJOURN IN CANAAN (Genesis 12:4-9 [4] So Abram departed, as the LORD had spoken unto him; and Lot went with him: and Abram was seventy and five years old when he departed out of Haran. [5] And Abram took Sarai his wife, and Lot his brother's son, and all their substance that they had gathered, and the souls that they had gotten in Haran; and they went forth to go into the land of Canaan; and into the land of Canaan they came. [6] And Abram passed through the land unto the place of Sichem, unto the plain of Moreh. And the Canaanite was then in the land. [7] And the LORD appeared unto Abram, and said, Unto thy seed will I give this land: and there builded he an altar unto the LORD, who appeared unto him. [8] And he removed from thence unto a mountain on the east of Bethel, and pitched his tent, having Bethel on the west, and Hai on the east: and there he builded an altar unto the LORD, and called upon the name of the LORD. [9] And Abram journeyed, going on still toward the south.
   See All...)
1. He comes to Canaan (Genesis 12:4-5 [4] So Abram departed, as the LORD had spoken unto him; and Lot went with him: and Abram was seventy and five years old when he departed out of Haran. [5] And Abram took Sarai his wife, and Lot his brother's son, and all their substance that they had gathered, and the souls that they had gotten in Haran; and they went forth to go into the land of Canaan; and into the land of Canaan they came.
   See All...)
1. At age 75 (Genesis 12:4So Abram departed, as the LORD had spoken unto him; and Lot went with him: and Abram was seventy and five years old when he departed out of Haran.
   See All...)
2. With Sarai and Lot
2. In the place called Sichem (Genesis 12:6-7 [6] And Abram passed through the land unto the place of Sichem, unto the plain of Moreh. And the Canaanite was then in the land. [7] And the LORD appeared unto Abram, and said, Unto thy seed will I give this land: and there builded he an altar unto the LORD, who appeared unto him.
   See All...)
1. God appears to him again
2. He builds an altar to the Lord
3. Between Bethel and Hai (Genesis 12:8And he removed from thence unto a mountain on the east of Bethel, and pitched his tent, having Bethel on the west, and Hai on the east: and there he builded an altar unto the LORD, and called upon the name of the LORD.
   See All...)
1. He builds an altar
2. He calls on the name of the Lord
4. He journeys on to the south (Genesis 12:9And Abram journeyed, going on still toward the south.
   See All...)
3. ABRAM’S JOURNEY INTO EGYPT (Genesis 12:10-20 [10] And there was a famine in the land: and Abram went down into Egypt to sojourn there; for the famine was grievous in the land. [11] And it came to pass, when he was come near to enter into Egypt, that he said unto Sarai his wife, Behold now, I know that thou art a fair woman to look upon: [12] Therefore it shall come to pass, when the Egyptians shall see thee, that they shall say, This is his wife: and they will kill me, but they will save thee alive. [13] Say, I pray thee, thou art my sister: that it may be well with me for thy sake; and my soul shall live because of thee. [14] And it came to pass, that, when Abram was come into Egypt, the Egyptians beheld the woman that she was very fair. [15] The princes also of Pharaoh saw her, and commended her before Pharaoh: and the woman was taken into Pharaoh's house. [16] And he entreated Abram well for her sake: and he had sheep, and oxen, and he asses, and menservants, and maidservants, and she asses, and camels. [17] And the LORD plagued Pharaoh and his house with great plagues because of Sarai Abram's wife. [18] And Pharaoh called Abram and said, What is this that thou hast done unto me? why didst thou not tell me that she was thy wife? [19] Why saidst thou, She is my sister? so I might have taken her to me to wife: now therefore behold thy wife, take her, and go thy way. [20] And Pharaoh commanded his men concerning him: and they sent him away, and his wife, and all that he had.
   See All...)
1. Abram Journeys to Egypt (Genesis 12:10-13 [10] And there was a famine in the land: and Abram went down into Egypt to sojourn there; for the famine was grievous in the land. [11] And it came to pass, when he was come near to enter into Egypt, that he said unto Sarai his wife, Behold now, I know that thou art a fair woman to look upon: [12] Therefore it shall come to pass, when the Egyptians shall see thee, that they shall say, This is his wife: and they will kill me, but they will save thee alive. [13] Say, I pray thee, thou art my sister: that it may be well with me for thy sake; and my soul shall live because of thee.
   See All...)
1. He goes because of a famine in Canaan (Genesis 12:10And there was a famine in the land: and Abram went down into Egypt to sojourn there; for the famine was grievous in the land.
   See All...)
2. He worries about his wife (Genesis 12:11-12 [11] And it came to pass, when he was come near to enter into Egypt, that he said unto Sarai his wife, Behold now, I know that thou art a fair woman to look upon: [12] Therefore it shall come to pass, when the Egyptians shall see thee, that they shall say, This is his wife: and they will kill me, but they will save thee alive.
   See All...)
3. She is very beautiful (Genesis 12:11And it came to pass, when he was come near to enter into Egypt, that he said unto Sarai his wife, Behold now, I know that thou art a fair woman to look upon:
   See All...)
4. He is afraid the Egyptians will kill him in order to get her (Genesis 12:12Therefore it shall come to pass, when the Egyptians shall see thee, that they shall say, This is his wife: and they will kill me, but they will save thee alive.
   See All...)
5. He instructs her to tell the Egyptians that she is only his sister (Genesis 12:13Say, I pray thee, thou art my sister: that it may be well with me for thy sake; and my soul shall live because of thee.
   See All...)
6. NOTE:  In this, the first mention of Egypt in the Bible (Genesis 12:10And there was a famine in the land: and Abram went down into Egypt to sojourn there; for the famine was grievous in the land.
   See All...), Abram goes “down into Egypt.”  Throughout the Bible, Egypt is a type of the world.  The Israelites are in captivity in Egypt and must be redeemed from the land in Exodus.  Isaiah 31:1Woe to them that go down to Egypt for help; and stay on horses, and trust in chariots, because they are many; and in horsemen, because they are very strong; but they look not unto the Holy One of Israel, neither seek the LORD!
   See All... says, “Woe to them that go down to Egypt for help.”  This theme is continued throughout the Bible.  Even in this story, Abram builds an altar at Bethel (Genesis 12:8And he removed from thence unto a mountain on the east of Bethel, and pitched his tent, having Bethel on the west, and Hai on the east: and there he builded an altar unto the LORD, and called upon the name of the LORD.
   See All...).  However, there is not another altar until Abram comes back to Bethel after he leaves Egypt (Genesis 13:3-4 [3] And he went on his journeys from the south even to Bethel, unto the place where his tent had been at the beginning, between Bethel and Hai; [4] Unto the place of the altar, which he had make there at the first: and there Abram called on the name of the LORD.
   See All...).
2. Abram in Egypt (Genesis 12:14-17 [14] And it came to pass, that, when Abram was come into Egypt, the Egyptians beheld the woman that she was very fair. [15] The princes also of Pharaoh saw her, and commended her before Pharaoh: and the woman was taken into Pharaoh's house. [16] And he entreated Abram well for her sake: and he had sheep, and oxen, and he asses, and menservants, and maidservants, and she asses, and camels. [17] And the LORD plagued Pharaoh and his house with great plagues because of Sarai Abram's wife.
   See All...)
1. Sarai taken into Pharaoh’s house (Genesis 12:14-15 [14] And it came to pass, that, when Abram was come into Egypt, the Egyptians beheld the woman that she was very fair. [15] The princes also of Pharaoh saw her, and commended her before Pharaoh: and the woman was taken into Pharaoh's house.
   See All...)
2. Abram treated well for Sarai’s sake (Genesis 12:16And he entreated Abram well for her sake: and he had sheep, and oxen, and he asses, and menservants, and maidservants, and she asses, and camels.
   See All...)
3. Pharoah’s house plagued because of Sarai (Genesis 12:17And the LORD plagued Pharaoh and his house with great plagues because of Sarai Abram's wife.
   See All...)
3. Abram Sent From Egypt (Genesis 12:18-20 [18] And Pharaoh called Abram and said, What is this that thou hast done unto me? why didst thou not tell me that she was thy wife? [19] Why saidst thou, She is my sister? so I might have taken her to me to wife: now therefore behold thy wife, take her, and go thy way. [20] And Pharaoh commanded his men concerning him: and they sent him away, and his wife, and all that he had.
   See All...)
1. Pharaoh reprimands Abram (Genesis 12:18-19 [18] And Pharaoh called Abram and said, What is this that thou hast done unto me? why didst thou not tell me that she was thy wife? [19] Why saidst thou, She is my sister? so I might have taken her to me to wife: now therefore behold thy wife, take her, and go thy way.
   See All...)
2. Pharaoh sends Abram away (Genesis 12:20And Pharaoh commanded his men concerning him: and they sent him away, and his wife, and all that he had.
   See All...)
4. ABRAM’S RETURN TO BETHEL (Genesis 13:1-4 [1] And Abram went up out of Egypt, he, and his wife, and all that he had, and Lot with him, into the south. [2] And Abram was very rich in cattle, in silver, and in gold. [3] And he went on his journeys from the south even to Bethel, unto the place where his tent had been at the beginning, between Bethel and Hai; [4] Unto the place of the altar, which he had make there at the first: and there Abram called on the name of the LORD.
   See All...)
1. Abram comes out of Egypt as a rich man (Genesis 13:1-2 [1] And Abram went up out of Egypt, he, and his wife, and all that he had, and Lot with him, into the south. [2] And Abram was very rich in cattle, in silver, and in gold.
   See All...)
2. Abram returns to Bethel and builds an altar (Genesis 13:3-4 [3] And he went on his journeys from the south even to Bethel, unto the place where his tent had been at the beginning, between Bethel and Hai; [4] Unto the place of the altar, which he had make there at the first: and there Abram called on the name of the LORD.
   See All...)
3. Bethel means “house of God”
4. For centuries, preachers have used Bethel as a picture of those who come back to God after leaving Him and getting in the world.  Perhaps you have a student who needs to come back to Bethel.

As to returning to that clean feeling of being forgiven and right with God, that may be a bit more difficult. Even faithful believers have a tendency to lose their first love (Revelation 2:4Nevertheless I have somewhat against thee, because thou hast left thy first love.
See All...). That is, they lose their first conviction that all Christians love God and have pure hearts; their original sense of nothing between them and their Saviour; their first zeal for the Lord. Often, even if they continue to go to church and serve, they live the remainder of their days as spiritual dullards, not growing in the things of the Lord and not fully enjoying their inheritance in Christ. Let's look at how this happens and then at how to return to the center of God's will and favor.

THE PATH OF FIRST LOVE LOST

This is only a narrow survey and does not cover everything, but we will look at three trends in the life of believers as they stray away from the Lord. First, they lose their innocence about other Christians. Second, they lose their confidence in their ability to maintain a right relationship with God. Third, they lose their joy in service to the Lord. We need to consider each of these separately.

First, new Christians have found the solution to life in Jesus Christ and have an initial zeal for all things pertaining to Him. The full forgiveness of sins, the hope of heaven, the presence of God, and a newfound family of brothers and sisters in Christ who join with them are all causes for great joy and fulfillment. However, somewhere, sometime, it will surely happen. They will discover the flaws in other believers. They find that their Christian family is not only imperfect; but sometimes as petty and mean as those who are lost. They may even be shocked by a complete failure of one they admired and looked up to with great confidence. Some new believers do not survive this initial shock and go back to the world; others never return to the initial level of joy. It is a very dangerous time and mature believers should be aware of this trial and help weak Christians through it. Unfortunately, today's churches have few mature Christians who will look out for others in this way.

Second, although new believers know their own weakness, they have the proper understanding that this new way of life is forever. They have changed forever and never want to return to the old ways. Initially, their faith for this is in God, but as they continue to live a clean Christian life, that confidence invaribly transfers to themselves. They recognize that they have changed and they unconsciously begin to take credit for who they now are. When this happens, they invariably fail in some major way. They may not fully go back to their old ways as you did, but they see themselves in an ugly light that they thought was left behind. They realize with shock that they are still capable of doing any wrong. Those who do not handle this in God's way will at best become cynical in their Christian life. They will be convinced that the Christian life is different only in degree but not in essence. We become dirty sinners trying to live up to an impossible ideal.

Third, much as a result of the first two steps, service to God loses its special joy. Malachi 1:13Ye said also, Behold, what a weariness is it! and ye have snuffed at it, saith the LORD of hosts; and ye brought that which was torn, and the lame, and the sick; thus ye brought an offering: should I accept this of your hand? saith the LORD.
See All... describes the people as saying, "Behold, what a weariness is it!" That is, "How boring living for God has become." At this time, the Bible seems like a closed book, prayers seem to go nowhere, church services lose their joy, and it becomes a struggle to do anything for the cause of Christ. This is a very dangerous time. Some quit on God. Some keep showing up at church but quit inside. They join the band of dead Christians that make up most churches today. But others get serious with God and keep coming back to the center of God's presence. Let's see how they do it.

THE RETURN TO THE FIRST LOVE

The path back to God is to reverse the errors that brought you this way. Some preachers call this Back to Bethel because of Abraham's return to Bethel to make things right after he had left God's place for him and gone to Egypt (Genesis 12:8And he removed from thence unto a mountain on the east of Bethel, and pitched his tent, having Bethel on the west, and Hai on the east: and there he builded an altar unto the LORD, and called upon the name of the LORD.
See All...; Genesis 13:3And he went on his journeys from the south even to Bethel, unto the place where his tent had been at the beginning, between Bethel and Hai;
See All...). You have to go back by the way you came.

First, you have to put your confidence in the Lord and not in other believers. Psalm 118:8It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man.
See All... states, "It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man." Others will sometimes disappoint us, but the Lord will never fail us. God and He alone must be your hope and confidence. There will be times when the Lord allows you to see the flaws of those you admire most in order to force you to recognize Him as you sole source of strength and help. This step involves a full return to looking on the Lord and recognizing that even the best men will sometimes fail you. Renew your confidence in the Lord. Go to Him and confess your error in looking too much to others and He will again lift you up.

Second, it is not enough to lower your confidence in others; you must also lose your confidence in yourself. A mature Christian has a strong sense of his own weakness and fallibility. He knows all too well that anything he has done or will do for the Lord is done by the grace of God. Everyone says this; the mature believer knows it by second nature. The return to God begins with repentance. Immediately after Jesus scolds the Ephesian church for losing their first love, He tells them: "Remember therefore from whence thou art fallen, and repent, and do the first works" (Ephesians 2:4-5 [4] But God, who is rich in mercy, for his great love wherewith he loved us, [5] Even when we were dead in sins, hath quickened us together with Christ, (by grace ye are saved;)
See All...). They are to recognize and admit what they had lost; they are to repent of their sin; they are are then to return to their first works. This experience does something else in the life of the believer. It leaves them sadder but wiser. They come to realize that salvation is not a guarantee that they will never fall into sin. They must keep eternal vigilance. They realize their own leanings to sin--even as a child of God. In Romans 7:18For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not.
See All..., Paul admitted, "For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing." In Philippians 3:3God came from Teman, and the Holy One from mount Paran. Selah. His glory covered the heavens, and the earth was full of his praise.
See All..., he identified faithful believers as those who "have no confidence in the flesh." This realization is a most difficult lesson, but if we use these times to renew our reliance on the Lord, we will grow in grace.

Third, you must exercise yourself in godliness (1 Timothy 4:8For bodily exercise profiteth little: but godliness is profitable unto all things, having promise of the life that now is, and of that which is to come.
See All...) in order to overcome your deadness to spiritual things. You don't feel like going to church? Go anyway, every time the doors are opened; and ask God to give you something. You don't want to read your Bible? You will not get over this by refusing to read. You will get over it by forcing yourself to read more while asking the Lord to once again open the windows of heaven and give you a blessing. This works the same with prayer, giving, witnessing, and so one. If you cannot at first do it with joy, do it with determination. The joy will return in God's time. He has to see if you will be faithful. As Christ told the Ephesians, "do the first works" (Revelation 2:5Remember therefore from whence thou art fallen, and repent, and do the first works; or else I will come unto thee quickly, and will remove thy candlestick out of his place, except thou repent.
See All...).

CONCLUSION:

Although this letter has become long, I have only touched the surface. The exact same feeling you had when you were first saved will not return. I do not say this to discourage you. However, now that you have faced some of the ugly realities of even Christian life in this world, you cannot return to the ignorance of this possibility. You will never again be able to think that this could never happen. You know it can. That knowledge brings a gravity to your heart that can never be taken away.

But this is not to say that you cannot return to your first love, only that it may not be what you are looking for. What you can gain after the experience of failure is actually greater and deeper than the first experience of salvation. You learn how faulty you are and how faulty others are and find that God still loves and cares for you. As you grow in the Lord, He becomes ever more precious to you. Your relationship with Him goes from that of a small bubbly brook to that of a deep, flowing river. He is just as precious; even more so. But you learn to recognize and halt any transfer of confidence in Him to yourself or to others. You even learn that many of the trials and troubles we face are meant to teach us deeper and deeper confidence in Him alone.

I pray that the Lord shows you the way to return fully to Him and that you will be faithful until He brings you back into the center of His love and joy. May the Lord bless you on this journey.